Clunk, Clunk.

Yesterday I went on an epic journey. Allow me to write it in story form. I'll be... the Duke of Luchester.

The sun peeks up out of its slumber to tend to the day just as the moon slides away to hide from it. I, Duke of Luchester, prepare myself for another day's hard battle. Swinging my legs over the side of my bed, and slip my feet into my golden slippers. I clatter my way to the bathroom (seeing as my slippers are made of gold), tripping gracefully now and then. I hear a roar, and hide behind the laundry hamper until I realize it was just the furnace turning on. With a few, clunking, leaping bounds, I arrive safe and sound at the bathroom, despite the forces against my arrival upon this spot. I lift my bristled weapon to my mouth to tackle the evils from Plaquestan, and then I washed them down the drain.

Later on...

The King of Fringe, also known as the ruler of Bangs and myself have had an on-going battle. More recently on the battle field, I've noticed my army of eyelashes has been having difficulty keeping the King of Fringe at bay. This calls for extreme measures, so I sent in the terrifying Scissorio to take him down in a few short snips. Scissorio did such a good job, that my army of eyelashes took a two week leave to visit their families. Scissorio, in fact did too good a job, and the eyelashes might not have enough money to support their families for a while... damn you Scissorio.

(Translation:
The sun came up and I got out of bed (I don't actually have gold slippers, I don't have any slippers at all, I just thought I duke might have golden slippers). Then I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth.

Later on...

My bangs are too long, always poking into my eyes and I need to cut them, so I decide to do them myself. Shit, I cut them to short.)